


The Boy With the Dog

by bortzy



Series: Favourite Memories [1]
Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Basically the Choi's mother, Childhood Memories, Implied/Referenced Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-05
Updated: 2018-01-05
Packaged: 2019-02-28 11:57:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,077
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13270983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bortzy/pseuds/bortzy
Summary: It's the only memory Saeran’s refused to touch, and the only memory the Saviour was unable to tamper with. His only pure memory not tainted by abuse or fear.The one day he’s never quite remembered, but never forgotten either.





	The Boy With the Dog

**Author's Note:**

> Written some time last year for the MM Favourite Memories Zine I was a part of! I wanted to post both my pieces here too, and as you've probably guessed, they're both Yooran, but they're separate stories.  
> Second one will probably be posted tomorrow~

It was rare for them to ever get a day like this, so they needed to make the most of it when they did. Saeran glanced uncertainly at Saeyoung as they stood in front of their mother, who was passed out on the couch. Saeran preferred her when she was like this. It meant she couldn’t hurt them. Sometimes he even had the horrible thought of wishing she would never wake up.

“Are you sure?” Saeran whispered.

Saeyoung turned to Saeran, giving him a small smile as he did. “Yeah, I think so.”

Saeyoung opened the front door carefully as Saeran quietly tiptoed over, terrified of waking her. He knew realistically that during these times not much could wake her up, but that didn’t stop the fear.

As soon as he felt the air hit his face, he knew they’d made it. Saeyoung closed the door behind them and reached out for his twin’s hand, which Saeran took with a smile. It was as though as soon as they stepped out that door everything was okay. Nothing could hurt them, and if they both ignored the bruises and burn marks littering Saeran’s body, they could pretend nothing ever had.

They didn’t usually have anywhere they particularly wanted to go, but they had places they liked more than others. It always depended on how they were feeling. They always wanted to make the most of these rare occasions, and Saeyoung always let Saeran choose where to go because he didn’t get to go outside as regularly.

“Can we go somewhere new?” Saeran asked as they walked along the path.

“Yeah, okay.” Saeyoung nodded, causing his too-big glasses to slide down his nose. “What kind of place do you want to go?”

Saeran bit his lip in thought for a moment and tilted his head up to the sky. “Hmm. Somewhere… with lots of grass so we can lie down. And not too many trees so we can see the clouds.”

Saeyoung thought for a moment. “Okay, I think there’s a field near the church I go to over this way.” He gestured vaguely with his hand, and Saeran suspected he didn’t know exactly where it was. He didn’t mind. He liked walking with Saeyoung.

They never knew how long they would have out the house before their mother noticed, but they always made the most of these times together. They could pretend they had nowhere to go back to, and that if they did, it was somewhere they lived by themselves. Saeyoung always promised one day they could live alone together, and Saeran couldn’t wait for that day to come. But until then this was all they had.

They eventually found the field (or maybe it wasn’t the field Saeyoung had intended, because Saeran couldn’t see a church anywhere) and it was pretty. The grass was slightly too long and reached halfway up Saeran’s calves, tickling his legs. There was what looked like a small stream of water at one edge of the field a little distance away, and it had trees overhanging it in a way Saeran had never seen before. It wasn’t much, but he loved it.

“There’s this game I heard people talking about,” Saeyoung said, his voice excited as he looked round at the deserted field. “It’s called ‘tag’, and you chase each other around. One person’s the tagger, and the other person has to run away, and then if the tagger catches them and touches them and says ‘tag’ the other person is the tagger instead!”

Saeran looked at him, a little confused. “I don’t understand.”

Saeyoung stepped around in front of him. “Ok. Pretend I’m the tagger. You would have to run away from me and I would chase you. Then when I catch you, I do this,” Saeyoung reached out and touched Saeran’s shoulder, “and say ‘tag!’ which means that now you have to chase me and catch me.” Saeyoung took his hand from Saeran’s shoulder and grabbed his wrist, placing it on his chest. “Now say tag.”

“Tag,” Saeran said uncertainly.

“Now I’m tag again!”

It took Saeran a little while to fully get the hang of it, but eventually they were running around the field, giggling and trying to catch each other. Saeran thought Saeyoung might be going easy on him, because there was no way Saeran would have been able to catch him if he’d _really_ been trying to run away, but it was still fun. They rarely got times like these.

Saeyoung had gone without food the previous night so Saeran could have it instead. They always tried to alternate so that each day at least one of them had enough, but this meant Saeyoung got tired fairly quickly after running around. They found a tree to lie under, their fingers interlocking almost instinctively by now. The silence was comfortable, and Saeran stared up at the clouds through the thin branches. They were lucky it was sunny today instead of raining like it sometimes was when they went outside, but in all honesty Saeran never minded what the weather was. The only reason he bothered to keep living was for days like this.

“Saeyoung?” he said after a while, and he turned to him in a mild panic when he got no response. Oh. He was asleep. Saeran felt himself relax.

After a few moments he heard a noise. It was a weird noise, and was like nothing he’d ever heard before. He sat up in confusion, his hand sliding out of Saeyoung’s as he saw something in the distance.

He’d seen this before. Or, at least, he’d seen pictures of similar things before. As far as Saeran could tell, this was a dog, and that noise it was making must be a ‘bark’ noise like he’d seen in some of the picture books Saeyoung sometimes brought home for him.

It ran towards him, evidently excited to have found people, and Saeran began holding out his hands to block it. Maybe it was angry with him. Maybe it might hurt him. He closed his eyes and cowered backwards, surprised when he finally felt something wet and sloppy on his hand. He opened his eyes in shock.

“Ew!” he shrieked, retracting his hands as the dog tried to continue licking them. He started aiming for his face instead. “Hey! That’s gross!” Saeran, stood up to get out of its reach, but the dog just resorted to licking his bare legs. Saeran shouldn’t have worn shorts today. He backed away, but the dog followed, and eventually it slipped into some kind of game between them. Saeran didn’t mind all that much, really, but every noise of complaint he made seemed to excite the dog even further. It wasn’t long before he started running away, giggling as it chased him.

“No! No! No! You disgusting dog!” he yelled gleefully, and the dog barked back.

After a while, Saeran became aware of another voice. Had Saeyoung woken up and started looking for him? But… no, it didn’t sound like Saeyoung’s voice. It was softer. Saeran faltered in his running for long enough for the dog to catch him, and he fell to the ground in surprise as it jumped up to start licking his face again.

“Oh no! Bad girl!” The voice was distinguishable now, and Saeran tried to push the dog away for long enough to figure out where it came from. The dog was lifted off him, and Saeran sat up, wiping his face on his shirt before looking up at the person. “I’m so sorry,” he apologised. It was a boy with straight, brown hair, around Saeran’s age, maybe, and when he looked at him, he saw that his eyes were purple. His clothes weren’t torn and dirty like Saeran’s, but the boy didn’t seem to even notice Saeran’s less than presentable state.

“That’s ok,” Saeran said, pushing himself to his feet. They were about the same height, too.

“This is Sally,” he said, putting her back down on the ground, and she immediately jumped up and started trying to lick Saeran again. The boy giggled. “Ooh! She likes you!”

“Really? She’s funny.”

“Yeah,” the boy agreed. “What’s your name?”

“I’m Saeran.”

“How old are you?”

“Nine.”

“Oh! I’m nearly nine! I’ll be nine on my next birthday!” he said excitedly.

Saeran found it odd that someone would get so excited over ages, but he didn’t say anything about it.

“What’s your name?” Saeran asked.

“I’m Yoosung.”

“Is this your dog?”

Yoosung shook his head. “No. It’s Rika’s dog.”

“Rika?”

Yoosung blinked at him in confusion, as though not understanding how he didn’t know Rika. “My cousin.”

“Cousin?”

“Huh?”

“What’s a cousin?”

“A… oh… um…” Yoosung frowned. “It’s someone in your family.”

Saeran thought for a moment. “I have a brother.”

Suddenly, Yoosung apparently decided he was tired of standing, and sat down on the ground. Saeran turned and looked the way he was facing. They were near the river, now.

“Can I sit next to you?” he asked uncertainly. Saeran had never really spoken to anyone other than his brother and mother before. Yoosung nodded, pulling something out his pocket as Saeran sat next to him with his legs crossed.

“Do you want one?” Yoosung offered, holding out a stick with a shiny red ball on the end.

“What is it?”

“A lollipop!” Yoosung said. “You don’t know much, do you? Even though you’re older than me.”

Saeran reached out and took it. “Not really,” he admitted, watching as Yoosung took the plastic wrapper off the red ball and put it in his mouth. Saeran copied.

As soon as the ball hit his tongue, he let out a small squeak of surprise. He hadn’t known anything could ever taste this good. The only food he and Saeyoung ever got was pretty plain. He looked up at Yoosung, who was watching him with sparkling eyes, as though waiting for his reaction.

“Do you like it?”

“Yeah!” Saeran said. “I’ve never had one before.”

“Do you know what ice cream is?”

“I’ve heard of it,” he said triumphantly, glad he finally didn’t have to look dumb in front of him. “I’ve never had it, though.”

“Wow! Maybe you should try it,” Yoosung suggested. “Is that your real hair?”

“What?”

“The colour.” Yoosung leaned forward and touched it. “It’s really red.”

“Oh. Yeah, it’s… real,” Saeran said uncertainly. Could hair be fake? He was too nervous to ask. Yoosung’s touch was soft, and nothing like Saeran was used to.

“It’s curly, too,” Yoosung pointed out as he pulled back. “I like it. My hair’s boring.”

“I think it’s nice,” Saeran said honestly.

“Thanks.”

They sat quietly for a moment, and then Saeran suddenly thought of something. “Do you know tag?”

“Tag? You mean the game?”

“Yeah! I just learnt about it today.”

“Oh! Is it your favourite game?” Yoosung asked.

“I don’t know many games,” Saeran admitted. “Tag is fun, though.”

“Do you go to school?” Yoosung asked suddenly, and Saeran looked at him in surprise.

“No.”

“I like school,” Yoosung said, reaching out and scratching Sally’s ears. “A lot of people don’t like it, but I’m really good at everything we do, so I do like it. You can play tag with your friends at break time. Why don’t you go to school? You should come to my school!”

“I don’t know,” Saeran said a little sadly, looking over to the running water of the river. “I’m probably not good enough for school.”

“But school is so you can learn! You don’t need to be good at everything already, because they’ll teach you.”

“Let’s not talk about that,” Saeran said quietly. He knew he would probably never get to go, and he wasn’t sure he could handle Yoosung telling him how amazing it was.

“Do you want to play tag?” Yoosung asked.

“Oh! Yeah!” Saeran said excitedly.

Suddenly Saeran heard a crunch, and he looked at Yoosung in surprise. He seemed to have bitten the lollipop and was chewing the red ball instead.

“You should bite it off. My parents say I shouldn’t run with a stick in my mouth.”

“Why not?”

“I think if you fall over it means it could get stuck in your throat,” he explained. Saeran bit down on it, shocked when he felt it break between his teeth. He pulled the stick out of his mouth, and watched as Yoosung tossed his towards the river. He giggled when he did. “That was bad.”

“What was?”

“Littering. But, it’s okay. I think these sticks are biodegradable.” Saeran had no idea what that word meant, but Yoosung looked proud to have used it so he didn’t mention it. He threw his stick too and they both pushed themselves to their feet. “Sally will probably chase us, too,” Yoosung warned, and Saeran smiled.

“I don’t mind. So… I’ll start as the tagger?”

They chased each other around the field. Yoosung was a good runner, and Saeran really loved the sound of his laugh so he kept falling over on purpose to hear it again. Sometimes they accidentally (or maybe not) ran into each other and fell to the ground, giggling as they pretended to fight. Eventually, Saeran lay on his back with Yoosung’s entire body thrown across his stomach as he pinned him to the ground. He was heavy, and Saeran felt breathless and exhausted, but he’d never been happier in his entire life. Sally decided to come and jump around them excitedly, and Saeran covered his face as he giggled, trying not to let her slobber over him.

Yoosung sighed, grinning, and lifted himself enough to look at Saeran. “You’re fun.” Saeran felt pride swell inside him. No one had ever said that to him before.

“This is the best day ever,” he said. Yoosung nodded, and pushed himself off Saeran. Saeran sat up and stretched a little as Yoosung looked up at the sky.

“I should probably get home,” he said regretfully, and Saeran feels his heart sink a little.

“Will I be able to see you again?”

“Maybe! I come to this field to walk Sally quite a lot, so maybe I can see you again soon?” he said excitedly. Saeran could feel his heart sinking further, but he didn’t want to let this ruin his day.

“Maybe.”

Yoosung helped pull him to his feet and they brushed themselves off. Yoosung had some twigs and grass in his hair, so Saeran reached out and brushed some of them out. Yoosung giggled and did the same for him.

Yoosung left with Sally and Saeran watched sadly as he did.

He didn’t see him in that field again, but he never forgot those excited, purple eyes.

 

* * *

 

**Twelve Years Later**

 

Saeran can hear someone outside his room, and at first he assumes it’s just Saeyoung. It quickly becomes clear, however, that there are multiple people out there, and he feels his stomach clench in an unwarranted anger. Saeyoung is _his_ brother, and he hates him but he’s _his_. Why does he get friends? Why should others get to talk to him freely?

Since being ‘saved’ from Mint Eye a few months previously, Saeran hasn’t spoken to anyone other than Saeyoung and the doctors and nurses at the hospital. It’s partly because Saeyoung probably thinks he’s unable to talk to anyone else, but also partly because Saeran doesn’t really _want_ to talk to anyone else. He doesn’t need friends.

Today, his bitterness is stronger than his anxiety, so he slams his door open.

“Can you shut the fuck up?” he yells. They’re not that loud, really, but he feels like every sound is stabbing through his skull. Two heads turn to look at him in surprise – one his brother’s, and the other that stupid blond kid from the RFA chat. Saeyoung’s best friend. What an idiot.

“Sorry,” Saeyoung says. “We didn’t realise we were being loud.”

Saeran glares at the blond kid. “Who the hell is this?”

“Oh, I’m Yoosung,” he says nervously.

“Yoosung,” Saeran repeats with a sneer, but then he feels something in his brain settle as he notices his eyes. He remembers something. Something he’s buried deep inside him. The only memory he’s refused to touch, and the only memory the Saviour was unable to tamper with. His only pure memory not tainted by abuse or fear.

The one day he’s never quite remembered, but never forgotten either.

Saeran had long forgotten his name, simply remembering him as ‘the boy with the dog’ to stop himself from forgetting it entirely. If he erased the details, that made it harder to reach, but also kept it safe in his head. But now he remembers it vividly, as though it’s being displayed right in front of him in high-definition.

“Yoosung?” he says again, as realisation hits him. His voice is small and shocked. The hair is different, but his eyes… they’re purple. They’re not excited right now, but they’re still the same and they’re still shining. Saeran feels his heart clench in his chest. “You’re Yoosung.”

“I… yeah?” Yoosung says uncertainly. He doesn’t remember. Of course he doesn’t. Why would he?

“Yoosung.” Saeran doesn’t know what else to say, so he whispers, “the boy with the dog.”

Yoosung’s face morphs into an expression of confusion. _Please let him remember. Please let him remember…_

“Sally?” he whispers back, standing up. Saeran has completely forgotten Saeyoung is in the room with them. Saeran nods. “We played tag…?”

He remembers! Saeran feels as though his heart is soaring, and he smiles the first genuine smile he has in a really, _really_ long time.

“Yes. We did. You gave me a lollipop.”

“Oh my God.” Yoosung clamps his hand over his mouth. “ _Saeran?_ ”

He even remembers his name. That makes Saeran want to cry with relief and happiness.

“I meant it when I said that was the best day ever.”

Before he knows what’s happening, Yoosung’s flung his arms around him. Saeran doesn’t usually do hugs, but his arms lock around Yoosung’s waist and he cries into his shoulder.

“You remember me,” he sobs, overwhelmed with countless emotions he can’t name.

“Of course I remember you! I’ve always remembered you,” Yoosung says, and it sounds like he’s crying, too.

“I’ve never been able to forget,” Saeran whispers, and the way Yoosung squeezes him tightly shows that he hasn’t either.

Hope blooms inside him. Maybe, now, he has something to cling onto.


End file.
